Monday, October 3, 2011

Listography--List of Things Men Never/Can Say to Their Mates

Well, since last week was an ode to Mama, I thought today would be for Daddy. I am pushing that to next week so I can help my brothers out. Men, there are certain things that you never ever make comment on unless you are reassuring your Woman that her self critique is not nearly as bad as she is lamenting.

Top 10 Things to NEVER EVER NEVER Make Comment On:
10. Comparisons to her mother (disparaging or otherwise)
  9. Comparisons to your mother/ex girl friends/wives (favorable or otherwise)
  8. Compaisons to her physically from the beginning of your relationship
  7. Comparisons to her mentally or emotionally from the beginning of your relationship
  6. Questions of her emotional state being tied to her menses
  5. Facial or body hair, odors or functions of any kind
  4. Fights that were had at any time in the past
  3. Negative Descriptors that could be misconstrued as "name calling"
  2. Housekeeping or Cooking that has gone awry
  1. Intamacy that was not up to your standards

And so that I let you know how you can survive, here are 10 Things You Can Say:

10. Thank you for being so thoughtful.
  9. I can't think of anyone who I would rather spend time with.
  8. I really enjoyed the (insert name of favorite meal) you made that time. Let's have that tomorrow.
  7. I am thinking of going to the gym/going for a walk/etc. Would you mind coming with me so you can keep me company.
  6. I have really been craving my mom's (insert name of favorite meal). I got the recipe from her. Would you help me make it?
  5. You seem a little stressed. What can I do to help?
  4. We haven't spent enough time together this week. Let's do something fun together tonight.
  3. I just really want to hug you right now.
  2. Let's eat out tonight. I was craving _________ anyway.
  1. I love you.

Here's to hoping you make it!

1 comment:

  1. you got the facial hair jab from Flanagan, didn't you? :)