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| One Year Ago and Now |
To say it's been a while since I blogged is an understatement. To help me get back in the groove, I am making a list of possible topics. For today, let's go with an update since my December post about weight loss surgery.
Transformation
In August 2014, my family and I
traveled to Mexico on vacation. At 332 pounds, I was devastated and embarrassed
to have to request a seatbelt extension from the flight hostess. To further my
devastation, my daughter Darby and husband Chad felt they had to make
themselves as small as possible so that I would be able to be somewhat more
comfortable traveling. Then while we were there, I wanted to parasail but was
told by an awkward young man that I weighed too much to complete the expedition
safely. The final insult to injury was, while I was able to slowly keep up with
our traveling party wherever we went, I spent one day of vacation unable to
leave the bed for the pain in my feet, back, and knees.
During this time, stuck in our
room, missing out on vacation, I was reminded of a recent doctor’s appointment
where my physician frankly told me that if I didn’t “do something” about my
weight, then I would be lucky to have 10 more years with my family. We had lost
my sister Gayla, 38, a few years earlier, and I could not hurt my parents, my
husband and daughter, and my friends by dieing young too. I had seen that
devastation and didn’t want to add to their misery. Then I did the math and
realized that my daughter would only be in her 20s in the next decade! I would
not leave her so early if there was something I could do to prevent it.
This line of thinking led me to
also remember that my husband and parents had spent the better part of three
years practically begging me to have bariatric surgery. I remembered being
offended and insisting that I could do it on my own. I spent those years trying
and failing to lose weight, exercise, and eat right. A little more math and I
figured out that I had gained 110 pounds in less than a decade. How would I be
able to lose what I had gained and 50 more in order to be considered a healthy
weight?
The night after we returned from
our vacation, I took a deep, shaky breath and told the love of my life, “I
don’t want to die.” I asked if his offer to support me and care for me through
bariatric surgery was still good. I had spent the day reading up on it and
explained that our entire life would change. What we ate, what we did,
everything would be altered.
This man, who will have my heart
forever, embraced me and my decision, reminding that my body was not like a
“normal” person. He said it “betrayed” me at every turn. I had sleep apnea and
had to sleep with a machine to keep me breathing. I also suffered with high
blood pressure, migraines, hypothyroidism, and high cholesterol. In the
previous five years, I had been hospitalized three times for suspected strokes
because my blood pressure was so high and migraines so tormenting.
From this conversation, there were
the ones we had with my parents and our daughter. All were on board and ready
to make this decision a reality. For my first information meeting, my husband
had to travel for work so our daughter insisted that she would go with me. She
said, “I want to know that this is the right thing for us to do.” The fact that
she was involved and she said “us” sealed it for me. This is what I would do.
Dr. Roshek of The NicholsonClinic led the information meeting, explaining all options available. He also
explained how most people gain weight back on regular diets because of a
hormone ghrelin that made you think you were hungry, even if you weren’t. Dr.
Roshek explained the statistics and surgery options so well that my daughter
was able to enlighten her father about what to expect, even using air quotes
when she explained the difference between the LapBand and the Gastric
Sleeve—“Sure the Lap is ‘reversible’ in that the device can be removed but your
stomach stays in that shape.” We chose the gastric sleeve option.
From this point we proceeded with
Dr. Carlton and an exploratory EGD, which showed I also suffered with a hiatal
hernia on top of my other ailments. I thought, “How have I survived this long much
less the next 10 years?” Once we had a surgery date with Dr. Nicholson, I began
to share the news with those closest to me. There were mixed reactions, but the
people who mattered the most said, “If this is what YOU want, then you have my
support.”
After surgery in December, there
was time for healing. However, I figured out pretty quickly that walking made
recovery so much better. I started walking. And walking. And walking. That got
boring so I took it to the gym…a gym for which I had been paying for years yet
using only sparingly, Lifetime Fitness. I found my trainer Aaron Frisvold and,
one month after surgery, I joined Lifetime’s 90-day challenge at the
encouragement of Aaron. I was elated the first time I ran a mile and ecstatic
the first time I ran two miles. Aaron continues to motivate me to hit those
Firsts. You could have knocked me over with a feather when I found out that I
had won the 90-day challenge!
Today we began the next 90-day
challenge at Lifetime. I have every intention of winning this too. However, I
feel like I am already a winner. I took on this life-long challenge and am a
whole new person for it. In April, it was discovered that I no longer need
blood pressure medicine. Shortly after that, I didn’t need the sleep apnea
machine when I slept. By the end of May, I had hit the 100-pounds-lost
milestone. The weight loss has slowed significantly, and I have turned to
looking at my muscle definition and body mass index for the progress. Aaron
gets excited about the number of calories the fancy scale says I burn because
of my lean muscle.
In the beginning, I sported a 53
BMI. Today that was down to 35 BMI. To date, I have lost 120 pounds and have 42
left till I hit my personal goal weight of 170 pounds, a weight I could
identify with being happy with my body. Also, at my last doctor’s visit, my
thyroid looked good and my cholesterol was “normal.”
The most amazing thing that I
have gained in all of this is self-confidence. For the first time in my life, I
am proud of me, inside and out. I love the life that is blooming all around me.
Chad and I greet each day for the adventure that is a life without the burden
of being overweight and unhealthy. We have even adopted a weekly date night
where he joins me at the gym. He has also discovered that he is a rock star at
cooking healthy.
My gratitude overflows for
everyone involved. To The Nicholson Clinic (Dr. Nicholson, Dr. Roshek, Dr.
Carlton, Sandy, and Melody), thank you for your expertise and continued
support. To Aaron and all the trainers at Lifetime, thank you for all of the
high-fives and at-a-girls that keep me running and pumping that iron. To my
friend Brandy, thank you for being my workout buddy and cheerleader. To my
friend Sarah, thank you for all the loaner clothes and the encouragement. To my
parents, thank you for the emotional and financial support to make this a
reality. Thank you for reminding me that I am always your “pretty baby.” To my
daughter Darby, thank you for reminding me that I have to love me as much as I
love anyone else if not more. Thank you for demanding that I stick up for
myself. To my darling Chad, thank you for making me admit that I needed help
from everyone, for learning to cook healthy, and for being my biggest fan.
